2/2/05
Can I just say, enough with the Anti-Semitism, already?
Now, I’m not saying this as a Jew. I’m not even saying it because I think Anti-Semitism is necessarily a bad thing. No, I think it’s fair that a small, semi-invasive foreign presence in your midst should by all means be persecuted. Whenever possible. In fact, I welcome you to go out of your way to come and persecute me. Slur it on, dude!
But it’s pretty clear that Anti-Semitism isn’t working. I mean, you non-chosen people have been going at us since roughly before the birth of Christ, and it’s evidently clear that we are the rubber to your glue of history.
And it’s not just the small, one-on-one Anti-Semitism that I’m talking about. I mean, sure, your Dreyfus Affairs and your blood libels are pretty cute, but no-one else can hold a candle to the Jews when it comes to actually getting state-sponsored campaigns to eradicate us. We’re talking big time government spending, now.
I think the Jews win hands-down in this department.
We’ve had the Diaspora, the Inquisition, the Pogroms, and the Holocaust. Bear in mind that the Holocaust was supposed to be the optimistically misnomered ‘final solution’. And we’re still HERE. Get the message, people! If even the Germans, who invented the concept of ‘grim efficiency’, couldn’t get it together to wipe us out, what hope do you think you’re going to have?
And why does Anti-Semitism always have to center around the idea of money? Some vast Jewsih/Bolshevik conspiracy to overturn the World Bank and enslave the populace. The Jews have all the money, don’t you know?
I’m lucky I’m liquid enough to buy my own underwear.
It’s not like I’m opposed to vast conspiracy theories, but Jews don’t own squat. No, it’s another group. A far more insidious, swarthy and downright hirsute cabal.
No, it’s not the Japanese.
No, it’s not the Saudi Royal Family, although you’re close.
It’s pretty clear that it’s the Texans who own everything.
I mean, two Bushes in the White House, House Leader Delay, Wal Mart, Enron, all the oil concerns, Clear Channel, and now SBC owns AT&T. The takeover is nearly complete. But how did it begin?
It all started that day by the Texas Schoolbook Repository. That’s when FDR’s great society began to be overturned by the evil forces of Texas. It wasn’t Oswald or the Mafia or Cuban Nationals who shot JFK. It was disenfranchised members of the Texas Rangers (the baseball franchise, not the Chuck show), who were paid off by Ladybird Johnson, so that her husband could take office and LBJ could do his work to promote civil rights and broaden our engagement in Vietnam, thereby ensuring both that no Democrat could be ever elected without carrying the south, again, and, of course, creating the “Swift Boat Veterans for Truth”.
What are they playing on “Celebrity Poker Showdown?” Texas Hold’em.
What’s America’s favorite condiment? Salsa.
Who controls America’s amusement park monopoly? Six Flags over Texas.
Why do you think they call it ‘the Lone Star State?’ It’s because, by the time they’re done with their master plan, there’s only going to BE one state. Motto: “Remember the Alamo. Or we’ll kill you.” Wait for the mandatory pit barbecues to begin in 2007.
I have it all on the good authority of my well-thumbed copy of “The Protocols of the Elders of Dallas.”
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